Posts (page 2)
I forgot I took this with Boon Foo's camera.
got these suckers on my last trip to Sarawak.
Hurt like BEJAYZUS. Especially the time Shida cleaned it with sterilizing liquid. I was crying a river.
Home alone for the weekend! yay! house to myselffffff ! running around naked shall commence! well maybe not entirely, I do live on the first floor! My bangsarian neighbors living on the opposite side of the street will go ballistic and point cannons at me.
right! updates. Things haven't been majorly busy, Ive just been more involved with certain things. exhibit A :
http://penantongtana.wordpress.com/ ( my blog specifically on my Sarawak trips! with photos! YAY ).
Ive also been contemplating of sabotaging the HESC group in my college since I didn't get shortlisted has President of the club. mwahah. ( HESC = Help Environmental Science Club ) . It was heartbreaking when I lost to bunch of juniors when they know close to nothing about the environment and haven't even done anything related! Going for the elections was like a slap in the face , seeing them give their below-average uninspiring speeches about " i want to save the world ya know?" , " come la, we all work together kay?" and everyone applauding like idiots. I was in tears and halfway through I walked out.Call me a sore loser if you wish, I just cant sit and take just halfhearted passion. I wanted to do so much with the club, get issues known, people aware and not just " lets all use eco-friendly bags". These juniors just want the whole " I was President" in their CVs. Their motives couldn't more obvious! Anyways, everything happens for a reason, and if im its not meant to be, so be it. ( ill just throw eggs at their house! )
Photobook still under construction! I keep changing the layout, photos and color. Plus, its pretty much stagnant at the moment still with all the additional pages I keep inserting ( almost bible-ish ) which is proportionally increasing the fee to the point of possibly making me hold out cardboards that say " feed me".
Went jamming yesterday with Amin, Zamir and Adam. They forced me into singing Paramore. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD THAT IS? T___T . Nonetheless, aside from chowing down banana fritters while they abused my ear drums with their beats and strums, I had fun. Early in the jamming session, Ali joined! he was excellent on the drums! Plus the studio was real comfy compared to the last one we went to, which had broken cymbals , no chairs or windows. At that time , Shamine was around. The gang jammed while I watched, spraying the room with perfume because the group that jammed before us were highschool students ( still in uniform! ), and we all know how hormonal sweaty teenage boys smell like!
Shisha session after with an addition of Murtaza and Raza ( who called us every 10 minutes scolding us due to our lack of punctuality ) was hilarious! Indian/Pakistani born Africans, everything they say has a racism connotation to it, but only in the funniest way! lugging our non-alcoholic wannabe beers called Barbican ( mine was pineapple, super yum! ), we talked about music, football ( this is when I zone out ) girls ( again cue zoning out ) .Adam and Zamir had to rush to Sentral to catch the last train to Putrajaya which had us leaving Castle early. Raza and Murtaza decided to join the ride since Amin was to send me home and they lived in Bangsar anyways. Well, the car was STUFFED. Murtaza was panicking half the ride , paranoid we'd get caught by the police, when Raza interjected " man, typical Africans, panic for nothing". We were in stitches laughing!
The only bad part of the night? Adam losing my Bobbi Brown rouge pot. I am in mourn.
the very reason when Matt messaged me saying there's an opening to climb Mount Kinabalu for an affordable price, I instantly said " Yes ".
Climbing on the 24th April via Mersilau trail :)
I find it odd how that morning I got an email from Adni, who was part of Sarawak trek :
"Eppy Besday! We shld yam char la one of these days. This weekend I'm going off fishing in Kenyir then straight to KK panjat Mt Kinabalu, probly after that we can lepak. Miss the Perisek frens alredi."
to which I automatically replied : .
"wow you're going to KK? DAMN NAK IKUT. haha why do i have collegeeeeee *sobs*
have a good time on Kinabalu! get loads of pics tau! :)
yes indeed we shall yam char when you get back! take care now !"
The whole day was spent thinking of ways I could go one day, when Matt sent me that message. talk about serendipity.
Major HUGS to Hannah and Hazwani Iqa ( and for those who came and sang for me! )for the super gorgeous cake!
I love you guys so so much!
thank you for all the wishes, hugs and being simply awesome!
this has to be one of the best birthdays Ive ever had in a long long time!
First self-potrait with the 40d. pretty sharp ey? so sharp that I look like I was struck by lightning at the sight of all my fly-aways!
this week had to be the craziest week Ive had. Aside from classes continuing as normal ( only one 10 am class! the rest are 8 am classes! I wasnt born with the early-bird gene. I don't friggin care about catching worms. ) , Ive had loads of work from Envy , plus various side projects of my own eg : my Penan photo-book. Its constant running around everyday to the point where I start my day at 6 am and don't reach home till late evening. Had a LAN Islamic studies test and an interview for those running as President for the environmental science club. I'm in the process of writing tons of letters to companies to get sponsorship for my next Penan project , which involves revamping the Sakai House in Long Seridan that was extremely grubby and bare the last time I was there ( a mice even threw a packet of maggi on my face *&#^@&! ). I lost my new dopod , lost 30 ringgit worth of phone credit and almost left my house keys in a cab to college one morning. My parents were furious with me when they found out about the phone since I just got the little lifesaver pda phone. Don't even ask me how I lost it, its still a mystery to me :( .
My cousin gave birth a few days ago to a little baby girl, Ayra Rayyan and my sister-in-law just popped as well, to another baby girl, Maryham Shawna. Running around visiting both of the two new family members is exhausting as the both live at opposites sides of the city!
I was reading the paper a few days ago about mudskippers infesting a beach in Penang ( correct me if im wrong ). Mudskippers? Those creatures look like mutated opera singers with their mouths dilated, who got the scraps at the bottom of the gene pool. Jeez, those suckers are UGGGUUHHLAYH!
oh and people in Iran breeding toads for the purpose of rolling their dried skins inside cigarettes to smoke and get spaced on? The chemicals on the toad's skin is actually a poisonous kind that is used as a weapon against predators, their natural defense mechanism, and these people are inhaling it? hmmm toad bong. TONG! ahah. or frog bong , FRONG!.
I found myself being very cliche that day, when I had a few hours break waiting for my editor to pick me up. I was sipping on a mug of cafe latte, in a corner seat at starbucks , ipod on, penning my thoughts on paper. I mean really Sophie? REALLY!? sigh, I really needed that break. In terms of creativity my brain has been bone-dry in perpetuum. Can a cuppa' joe really spark the axons and neurons in my brain?!
I'm still in mourn for my phone.
my phone. my phone. my lovely do-it-all dopod.
I don't feel like turning 19 just yet.
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2233878.ece
Landscapes such as this kept emerging throughout our 5 hour journey on the logging track , urging me to yell HAAAULLLTT I WANT A PICTURE, every few minutes. But we were on a time budget, and these scenes passed just as quickly as they appeared. The logging track was as bumpy and unpredictable as I remembered. We were taking a different route this time straight to Peresek, instead of the whole Adang-Gita-Peresek route we did the last time. A shorter route, nonetheless perfected driving skills is without doubt needed to manouver around and over the deadly potholes and huge muddy puddles found throughout the road. One wrong move, we'd be stuck. One wrong turn, we'd be off a cliff. The weather was playing mind games with us, one minute it'd get painfully hot, and the next would cover us in sea of mist and ( what I hope was ) clouds, after which light rain sprinkling our ride. Aunty Yatie, and Lai Fun were drifting in and out of sleep beside me, despite the car going humpiddy dumppity. I had my Ipod on, my little piece of home , to kill the long hours of the four-wheel journey. I was nervous to be honest, if the Penans would be waiting for us. There's no way of communication from us in their parts. I just messaged Mary and Eric and prayed that they'd be there. The ever prepared Boon Foo, on the other hand, was ready to pull a nighter on the road in case there was a no show.
After hours of driving, familiar faces appeared in the distance ahead of us. 4 figures walking, arms crossed, eyes to the ground, and our ride continued its humpiddy dumppity. Instantly I recognized Eric, Matsun, Mathew and Jeli. They looked so different compared to my last trip to Sarawak. They looked more mature, more grown up and not like the boys I remembered them to be ( makin hensem pun ada ahahha ). We were still quite a distance from the drop-off point, so the boys hitched a ride at the back of the four-wheel, while I started vibrating in excitement sitting in the passenger seat. I was so charged to see the rest, practically jumping out the window when I saw Yulina, Mary and Muli. Yulina had her hair braided and Mary looked as sour as ever ( just her exterior, she's a really caring person ). In total, 15 of them turned up ( says Tan ). It was a delightful reunion to see so many familiar faces I missed immensely. Shida , from our group recognized many of them from her frequent visits to the Rumah Sakai in Limbang. The drivers looked baffled at how close we seemed with the Penans. I forget how the Ibans or Kelabits view the Penans, labelling the Penans as uncivilized just because they perdue living in the forest.
I was stoked, pumped and ready to trek, calling out " lakauuuu, lakauuu" to Yuma, Selai's wife ( who after a few days with her I started calling E'e' - mother in Penan language ). Eager to carry my own haversack despite its lumbering weight, I trekked ahead with her, instantly having to climb steep muddy slopes and walk over huge logs and branches. I panicked, laughed at myself at how I underestimated all these treks. No matter how easy you think the trek could be, it'll NEVER BE!! AAAAA!. I could barely balance my unlithesome self , swaying constantly like a mad idiot while 55++ year old E'e' eased her way through the steep slopes and ridges with luggage twice or triple the weight of my bags anchored on her tiny frame. Penan - 10 , Sophie - 00000000 0____0
Astrid looked shocked, when I told her " this is easy compared to walking in the forest". We walked a for about 2 hours, until darkness crept slowly behind us and rain poured heavily. it was foolish to walk in the forest at night, especially when its raining and muddy! its like hmm.. triple threat!!. Lucky for us there were a few makeshift huts nearby where we ended our trek for the day. The huts were used by the penans when they had to travel for days to get to Limbang. There were 4 huts altogether and it was pitch dark by the time we reached them. Our torch lights were our lifelines. Imagine sorting out flysheets to harbor you from the rain while the rain pelts down on you in complete darkness. The signature cricket + insects melody of the forest's interior was a constant, and all we could see were the yellow orbs of our torch lights, desperate to find our faces to make sure everyone was around. I was to sleep with Astrid and Shida, while Boon Foo, his wife and Adni were in a neighboring hut, Aunty Yati and Param in a "deluxe" hut ( haha ) on higher ground. Tummies grumbling we started a fire , well not quite, Adni and Lai Fun did, I unashamedly watched T__T and I joined them for quintessential trekking dinner , lunch and every other possible meal : MAGGI! .The healthy meal ( we wish ) was followed by much crooning over Boon Foo's new D90 which worked wonders in low light. All the Penan girls left that night, in the raaaaaain , back to Peresek. I dont know how they survived that triple threat for 4 hours! They surely must've arrived at midnight or 1 am. The four boys stayed as they insisted on collecting the remainder of the donations and our duffel bags that we left at the drop-off point. I couldn't believe how they requested to trek back all the way to where we started ( it was a tough trek! loads of steep slopes ) at night , in the bleedin' rain, having to carry tonnes on their backs. There's nothing harder than those combined elements! Insane Penans. Really!
They left at 8pm and arrived at about 10.30 pm. Our campsite was quiet and I could only assume everyone was asleep while the Penans prepared themselves for rest when they returned. Zipping myself up in my sleeping bag to protect myself from the unholy teeny fecky insects which you dont see, but 100% feel, the rain continued to pour, and pour, and pour. 5 minutes later, " oh damn this, I'm sweating", and off came the sleeping bag and the frenzy of insect biting continued. Too preoccupied with Nazis of the insect world, I concentrated on the sound of water droplets falling through the dense leafy forest cap, begging myself to sleep.
yes, the baby is mine!
Before I left for Sarawak, I called up the Guru of photography, Syahrin to borrow his wide angle Lens, since I basically suck at owning expensive glass. He came over, laughed at my ridiculous trekking gear and showed me his new acquisition, the 5d MarkII ( the latest shiz for Canon , 8k a pop ). After throwing a tantrum of how unfair that he owns that new camera ( mucho shrieking and smacking ), I asked " eh 40d ?", to which he replied " jual lah", to which yours truly replied " I'm buying".
Now, no way in a million years would The Parents agree right? Surprisingly, my dad did. Syahrin was selling it at such an affordable price that both my dad and I knew we'd be daft to let it slip. Oddly things are suddenly taking a different turn since I got the camera, with photography jobs and assignments popping out , out of nowhere. There's a shoot for me to do in Kuala Berang , Terengganu at Tasik Kenyir for a tourism brochure, there's shooting Liyana of Estrella for Envy, shooting a hair salon in Hartamas , and of course Myra's fashion project. I think Sha wants a photo-shoot for her and old schoolmates as well. Pancakes all around my friends! haha ( HEY!! I make awesometh pancaketh )
I know exactly what would make my 40d baby shine till it blind all yo eyes! : the 50mm 1.4!!
Im going to get it before my next trip to Sarawak in May. after I sell my kidney. haha
BUT BUT BUT.
I didnt write much in my notebook there, since I was busy frolicking with the Penans, honing my language skills and complaning about my disturbing blisters.
I am tryiiinnnnggg to recall everything. I feel like a complete nut twat for not utilising my time to anti-socialize myself and write like someone *coughyesthatsyouDocParamhahacough*. Im paying the price of my rusty memory now.
I woke up pretty darn late today.
As usual, my roommates will switch the air-con off as soon as they get up, leaving me to toss in the bed all sweaty , eventually yelling at them to switch it back on, and of course Chinese cursing shall ensue to which I will reply "dhuedhjklnwxonclemmesleep".
phone beeped a miscall, it was Aunty Sheila.
"Sophie I tried calling your dad, but couldn't get through. but don't worry, I got his number from Haroun already"
"oh okay, why what's up?"
"its Achik, she's taken a turn and is dying"
"really, when did this happen?" . I felt time stopped for a brief second.
My dad, granduncle and grandpa visited my grandaunt Achik about a day ago, and according to my dad and her vital signs, she was stable. I guess thats what leukemia does, you just never know. I was with her today with my parents, instantly washed over by dread ,the air of sorrow hung thick in the air. Hushed voices, silent prayers, the shuffling of feet and the rustling of clothes. Everyone looked sombre and I knew this was it. She was leaving us for good. How do you react to seeing someone dying in front of you? Its an awkward situation. I want to burst out crying, but I cant. I want to rush over to her, whisper to her to be strong, to stay strong, yet my feet wont budge. All I could do was comfort others , watching my mother cry, my father cry. She was slipping in and out of a coma, pale as a ghost , arms bruised. I saw her daughters around her, their look on the faces and I looked at my own mother. I can never, ever imagine my mother in that state and I never want her to be. So many people have lost their siblings, or parent. I cant imagine losing mine. I don't think I could ever live without my parents, yet its inevitable. Death will come, as its only a matter of time. After all, we're all going heading towards the same ending, entering that vast unknown, alone. Death is a good reminder of how we should live our lives, how we should know our purpose on this earth. How life is so precious and so short. Mom kept mentioning about the afterlife, and how the as soon as your soul leaves your body, the angels take you up to visit all those who have passed on before you. The good souls are wrapped in veils with luscious sent, other angels would ask who the soul would be, alarmed by said scent. Those who have committed sin would of course be the exact opposite, and surrounding angels would be repulsed and not want to be associated with the soul altogether. Jeez, who the hell would want that? I feel like I've done so many wrongs despite being only 18. I feel like I have to start repenting my sins. I dont understand how people can go " oh ill drink till im 30, then repent later" or "hey if you want to be bad and do shit, now is the time to do it. when you're 50 and retired thennnnn go all zealous" . It doesnt work that way does it? what if you die before you repent? you'd carry ALL those sins. everyone thinks there's an easy ticket out. that God is " bound to forgive me". what if he doesnt? the worst thing that can happen to you is the when God stops caring about you. When the one Almighty power in this whole universe doesnt care about you, how would you feel?
Gosh, one islamic studies LAN class and I go all preachy, haha.
Nonetheless, I only hope that Achik goes with the least pain possible. I want her soul to be in those fragrant veils ( figure of speech or not ) and to be amongst those loved and protected by God. My prayers are with you.
update : Achik passed away at 4.10pm today, 8th february.
Inalillah.
thank you for always having me over to your home as child, hording all the Poly Pocket toys.
